Reason Reestablished
by wintermoonwitch
Summary: How will Spock and Nyota handle their new relationship? Sequel to Reason Interrupted; read that one first!
1. Chapter 1

**Reason Reestablished**

**A/N **This story is a sequel to my first, Reason Interrupted (find it in my stories!). I very much recommend you read RI first; I'm not stopping for explanations. I will do my best to post about once a week; no promises.

Please note that this story has a higher rating than RI, for sexual scenes. I apologize to anyone who is being turned away; I think M is for now, and I'll reevaluate, but it won't be anything crazy graphic.

To all my old readers—welcome back! I've missed hearing from you. Hope you enjoy! Be a dear and leave a review =]

As always—none of this belongs to me. I take Paramount's property and play around with it. I just thank them for letting us do it!

**Chapter One**

"Oh, my god," Gaila said, looking up from where she worked at her computer. Her eyes were wide, red hair wild. "Please tell me you just came back from Spock's."

Nyota froze in the doorway. She'd been hoping her roommate would still be sleeping, so she could sneak into the room and sleep a bit before having to explain her early arrival back at Starfleet from winter break. Closing the door and dropping her backpack next to the bed, she asked evasively, "What makes you say that?"

In a mock whisper that wasn't a whisper at all, Gaila replied, "You're totally turned on. I can tell."

"Gaila!"

Her roommate shrugged. "Don't look so surprised. Just tell me what happened!"

Nyota collapsed onto her bed. "Gaila, I've been awake for…" She gave up on the math quickly. "…way too long. I need sleep!"

She had, in fact, been awake since the morning before, plus a flight from Nairobi to extend the day. True, there had been a bit of sleep last night, at Spock's apartment…

"Did you sleep at his apartment last night?" Gaila asked, half scandalized, half inordinately excited.

"Not like _that_," Nyota insisted. "I didn't…_sleep over_. I was there, and I think I slept for a couple hours, on his couch." Gaila was watching her expectantly.

Nyota sighed. If she was evasive, Gaila would invent things worse than the truth.

"Okay, fine," she said, motioning Gaila over to her bed. The Orion woman hopped over enthusiastically, abandoning the computer.

"I knew you had news!"

"I came home early—"

"Clearly."

"—and you were _busy_ in here." Nyota paused, but Gaila didn't even blush. "And I went to Spock's. That's a little bit why I came," she admitted. "And we talked about the emotion thing, and we both admitted we're interested in each other."

"And?" Gaila prompted.

"And…we're…together," Nyota finished, trying to contain a grin. "But, Gai—you can't tell _anyone_. You can't hint or anything at all."

"I know, I know," Gaila waved her off.

"No," Nyota said, "Gaila, you can't. This is both our careers here. I will sell you into the slave trade, and then Spock will hunt you down and kill you. You know that, right?"

Gaila studied her friend's flashing brown eyes and nodded. "Okay, Ny, I promise. Not one innuendo."

Nyota held her hand out and they twined their fingers in an Orion handshake, and then she nodded.

"So…" Gaila said, "together. What does that mean?"

"No clue," Nyota replied, falling back onto her pillows. Though exhausted, she didn't really feel like she could sleep. She felt oddly lonely, as though a few hours with Spock's body and mind pressed to her had rendered her incapable of functioning any other way.

"Well, if you didn't do the deed, I bet he's committed," Gaila pointed out. "How you spent the whole night there without jumping his delicious, Vulcan—"

"Gaila!" Nyota groaned.

"Sorry," Gaila said unapologetically. "But you did find yourself one fine catch. I don't know how you did it."

"Me neither," Nyota said. "I didn't expect him to give in so easily." She let her eyes slip closed to better remember his cool, greenish skin under her fingers and the way his black eyes blazed at her. "He didn't even kiss me," she whispered.

"What? I thought you were together."

"We are. Believe me, I know how he feels about me," Nyota said, flashing vividly to his mind intertwined with hers, so close she couldn't distinguish where she ended and he began. "I don't think kissing is part of their deal."

"Huh," Gaila said with a tilted head. "Never considered it. I've never done a Vulcan, you know," she said conversationally.

"No, I didn't know."

"You'll have to tell me all—"

Gaila's words were cut off by a pillow in her face.

XXX

Spock's mind still contained a curious buzzing sensation. He had easily forgone sleep while Nyota was at his home. She had slept—still snuggled against his side on the couch, in fact—but he hadn't wanted to miss the opportunity to watch her. He'd felt slightly guilty watching her dreams, but her skin against his was too much to resist. She'd floated through her home in Africa, he'd seen her brother fleetingly; and then she had dreamt quiet dreams about him, which he found foreign and embarrassing, but simultaneously immensely gratifying. It had felt meditative, resting with her.

Once she'd gone, he'd slept 2.7 hours; now he found himself in a similar predicament to many vacation days. He'd eaten breakfast, but now had nothing on his agenda. His mind, instead of feeling satiated by her prolonged presence, now felt doubly isolated. He found this illogical, but could not use this simple argument to dispel the buzzing of his mind. He replayed their words to each other repeatedly.

Even though many of the cadets were off campus, the Physical Arts Complex had stayed open; Spock shouldered his duffel bag and wondered if he could clear his mind with some exercise.

Once he'd reached campus, he heard his name called out across the abandoned grounds. Dr. Ferrous waved to him and broke into a jog. When he stopped, his breath pooled in thin white fog around his grin. "Commander," he nodded, "how has your break been so far?"

"Satisfactory," Spock replied, unable and unwilling to encompass all that had happened in the past week.

"Are you on your way to the gym?" Ferrous asked. When Spock nodded, he said, "I'll go with you." The two men walked side by side down the path; they hadn't seen each other since term ended. "All set for Advanced Phonology?"

"Indeed," Spock said simply.

"Nyota popped in to tell me you'd accepted her as TA; she seemed quite excited."

Keeping his tone neutral, Spock said, "I believe she is eager to begin work towards gaining lieutenant this spring."

Ferrous nodded. "Hey, listen," he said, in Spock's opinion unnecessarily, "this is probably rude of me…but I have a favor to ask."

Spock met his eyes; when this was not, apparently, enough to prompt the man on, he said, "Yes?"

"This semester, when Alice invites us out to dinner…" The professor looked sheepish. "Could you maybe be busy sometimes?"

Bemused, Spock replied, "I will invariably have engagements on some nights when Alice wishes to—"

"No, I mean more often than you really are." Spock responded with only a blank look. Ferrous sighed. "I'd like to have some time just the two of us. See if I can…you know…" he shrugged.

Spock tilted his head. "Are you referring to your romantic interest in the professor?" Ferrous glared at him for his bluntness, but nodded. "So you wish for me to lie?"

"Just a couple white ones. You could actually be busy those nights."

As he opened the door to the gym complex, Spock asked, "Are you aware of the difficulty Vulcans have lying?"

"I believe in you," Ferrous said drily, stopping in the foyer.

Spock bowed his head. "I will attempt it, doctor."

Ferrous bowed out, leaving Spock in the relatively empty gym. He found an unoccupied holo room and requested combat practice. Perhaps that would keep him busy until he could see Nyota again.

XXX

Nyota rolled out of her bed around noontime; literally rolled, sending her feet down just in time to catch herself. She found Gaila grinning at her cheerfully and groaned. "What's that look for?"

"I was hoping you'd wake up in time for lunch," Gaila said as she stood. "Let's go, the dining hall is serving breakfast all day."

Knowing she would be dragged forcibly if she didn't go willingly, Nyota pulled on some clothes, glad she didn't have to wear her cadet uniform. She and Gaila stepped out into a cold, cloudy day and walked arm in arm to the dining hall.

Once they'd piled plates high with food, they sat together at an otherwise empty table. With a glance around the quiet hall, Nyota frowned. "You must have been lonely," she said.

Gaila shrugged. "I'm used to it, Ny. Don't you remember the last three years when I did the same thing?" Biting into her sandwich, she added, "Besides, I had company last night, didn't I?"

"Is that actually…satisfying, Gaila?" Nyota wondered as she started her salad.

Now Gaila furrowed her brow. "Aren't you a xenolinguistics major? You're supposed to be accepting of alien cultures, my dear."

"That's xenoculture studies," Nyota smirked. Then her expression softened. "But okay, sorry. It seems strange to me, but I guess there are plenty of humans who do it too."

"And aren't I lucky?" Gaila said, her easy smile returning. "You may be a monogamy girl, but there are plenty of men not like you." Nyota visibly straightened in her seat and Gaila turned to see Commander Spock enter the dining hall. "Though he, I suspect, is more on your side of the argument. Something about his vibe…"

Nyota snorted, though her eyes didn't leave the professor. "And you thought I was crazy for being able to feel his emotions? Now you're getting 'monogamy vibes' from him?"

"Look, Ny, I didn't mention this earlier…I may not have ever done a Vulcan, but I've heard stories." Finally Nyota's eye met hers again, and she looked curious. "And what I've heard may be monogamous...but it's kind of kinky."

Nyota wrinkled her nose. "I do not like the twinkle in your eye, Gaila. And I'm pretty sure I don't believe you." _Mostly sure_, she thought, studying Spock's back through his snug t-shirt. She tilted her head to the side. _Sort of sure_. Sometimes she wondered what he hid under that seemingly blank exterior…

When he'd taken his food, apparently soup, to a table by himself and had been eating for a few minutes, Nyota stood with her tray. "I'm just gonna go say hi…"

Gaila just smirked, but waved her off.

Striding across the dining hall, Nyota became suddenly nervous as she approached him. She shouldn't feel this off balance, not when they'd spent such…intimate time together. She knew exactly how he felt about her; why should she be uncomfortable talking to him in the dining hall?

When she neared, he looked up, and she knew, somehow, that he'd been watching her the whole time. For a moment, they just matched gazes; then Nyota felt his happiness seep into her, and a grin broke across her face. "Hi," she said, pulling out the chair across from him to sit.

He just tipped his head in his usual greeting, but his eyes didn't leave her. Those eyes said a million words, she thought. "How was your morning, Commander?" Another professor sat at the adjacent table, and she kept her tone light.

"Satisfactory, thank you, cadet," he replied simply, but his eyes remained unwavering.

She wanted to see him again; she wanted to be able to touch his skin again. But she hadn't wanted to send a message, worried it could be checked at some point…With sudden inspiration, she pulled out a PADD and started a word processor. "I have something I want to show you; to ask you about," she said with a sharp look. When she'd tapped out a few words, she passed the PADD to Spock.

He took it in his hands, wondering what she wanted to tell him that could not be said aloud. _May I cook for you tonight?_ He met her eyes again as anticipation spiked. "_That would be satisfactory,"_ he said, and with a few words added to the PADD, he passed it back, and stood. "Have a good afternoon, cadet," he said blandly before taking his tray to clear it.

Nyota repressed a smile as she erased the communication, his addition still clear before her eyes. _1900 hours._

XXXXX


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer **Not mine!

**A/N **Italicized conversation is spoken in Vulcan.

**Chapter Two**

Nyota wavered at the door out of her room. "Gaila?" The Orion looked up from where she lounged on the bed. "I'm going out." Her stomach was fluttering with anticipation, and she wasn't sure how she was going to make it all the way to his apartment.

Gaila just smirked. "See you tomorrow morning then?"

"I'm not sure," Nyota admitted. "I have no idea what to expect."

"Have fun," Gaila sang, and Nyota slipped out of the room to skirt across campus.

When she reached town, she stopped at a deli to pick up fresh vegetables and her stomach fluttered again. She stood in line behind an exacting, portly man and glanced over the desserts disinterestedly. What if he didn't like her cooking? What if she messed it up? _It's a stir fry, Nyota_, she told herself, and shook her head minutely. But once she'd made her purchases and started toward his apartment, she wondered if he had a pot big enough…

Such trivialities kept her mind off her real worries. She'd felt off kilter with him that afternoon: secretive. And she knew it was supposed to be sexy—isn't that supposedly why people have affairs—was this an _affair?_—but it had just made her wish she could touch his arm. Realization shot through her that perhaps he wouldn't want her to even if they weren't student and professor. They both had a lot to learn still; her steps quickened.

When she buzzed up to his room from outside, he didn't even speak with her before the door unlocked. She took the stairs, hoping to work off her extra energy, and then touched his door chime tentatively.

The door opened immediately on Spock's blank expression, but he quickly stood aside for her to enter. She wanted to fall against him and have his hands on her skin, but he hadn't even let his shields down so she could feel his emotions. Silently, he let the door close and turned to her; as soon as it whooshed shut, he took a cautious step towards her, his uncertainty and desire washing over her.

"Hi," she said again, smiling and stepping forward. His hands settled at her waist, and hers around his neck, as he rested his forehead against hers. Drowning in a pool of his relief, she shivered. 'You are late,' he accused wordlessly as his thumbs traced circles at her waist.

Unused to speaking in her mind, Nyota murmured, "I had to get food." She gestured to the abandoned bag of groceries at their feet. Spock released her and bent to pick up the bag and bring it to the kitchen. "_Please remove your shoes,"_ he reminded her.

She did so and followed him to where he was pulling vegetables out of the paper bag and examining them. He turned to her with a subtly raised eyebrow. "_You'll see," _Nyota said easily as she took the bean sprouts from him and placed them on the counter. "_Do you have a…_peeler?" she asked. "I don't know my domestic vocabulary," she realized with a smirk. Wordlessly, he pulled one from a drawer and handed it to her, then watched as she attacked the carrots.

She glanced over at him slyly as she worked; he lounged—_lounged—_against the countertop, his eyes on her hands. He didn't appear nervous, but he was shielding his emotions again. "Spock," she said softly, bringing his eyes up to hers. Her hands stilled.

When she didn't speak for a few moments, he prompted, "Yes, Nyota?"

"This is weird, isn't it?" she half smiled.

"Please specify," he said, widening her grin.

"I'm in your apartment, cooking. I feel weird. Should we talk about this?" she asked, turning to rest her hip against the counter, facing him. Still, his dark eyes were expressionless.

After a moment, he spoke. "I have told you I intend to try 'this.' Though it seems to evade definition, perhaps an accurate moniker would be 'relationship.'" He paused, as though awaiting her agreement; she nodded. "I assume you have more experience in this area, so I will let you lead. I assure you, though you may find cooking in my kitchen 'weird,' I find it pleasant."

With a soft smile, she stepped up to him and slid her hands around his waist. Though he didn't move, she took the lack of withdrawal as approval. "I find it pleasant, too," she said, unaware that her soft tones sent a wrench through Spock's gut. "Will you do me a favor?"

He only said, "Most likely."

"Will you let me feel your emotions? Doesn't that take less effort anyway?"

Slowly, Spock let his mental shields disperse. He'd been grasping them tightly since she first told him about the phenomenon, but now they'd agreed to be…together…he had no reason to restrain it, did he? Closing her eyes, she felt his emotions well through her. "That's better," she whispered, and let him go to return to chopping vegetables. "Would you like to help me?"

Spock tucked his hands behind his back; despite the lack of teaching uniform, he looked just as he did at the front of her class, when he lectured. "_I assumed you were aware that the Vulcan custom is to have the guest prepare the meal."_

"_Which I don't get, because how am I supposed to navigate your kitchen by myself?"_Nyota said as she opened several cupboards to search them.

Spock opened the one beside him and offered her a cutting board. "_You would have found it without my assistance."_

Nyota looked down at where he'd taken it from. "Who puts cutting boards under the sink?"

Spock did not answer with a frank, _I do_, but did pull out two paring knives and return to Nyota's side. When he picked up a red bell pepper, he noticed Nyota's raised eyebrows. "I thought I was supposed to do it all myself, while you sit back and critique," she said archly.

He studied her for a moment, but decided the lift to her eyes meant she was teasing. "Would you prefer that?"

Nyota blinked; she couldn't say why, but something about his flat query about what she would _prefer_ sent a thrill through her. Turning away, she said, "Just chop the pepper."

He did as she commanded, and they worked side by side chopping vegetables. After a minute or so of silence, Spock said softly, "_Music."_ His command carried into the living room, where presumably recessed speakers began playing a soft lute melody. Nyota looked over at him, surprised.

"I wouldn't have pegged you for the music type," she admitted. She added her roughly cut pepper to the precise slices Spock had produced, and started the onion.

"What precisely do you mean by 'music type'?" he asked.

Nyota shrugged. "I've just never heard you play music before. I assumed you wouldn't like it on while we worked."

"I play music often while I cook, though not while working or meditating. I went to your last choral concert, and can play the lute. So perhaps I am the 'music type,'" he said simply, eyes still on the carrots beneath his fingers.

Further surprised, Nyota turned to him, unsure which confession she should start with. Finally, she settled on, "I didn't see you at our concert. The Christmas one?" It had flown by without much thought on her part; she was too busy with finals to put much worry behind it. She seemed to remember mentally reviewing for—actually, for Spock's final while she sang.

"Yes."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"It did not seem important to inform you of my presence."

She didn't know what to say, so she settled for chopping the onion. "You'll have to play for me sometime," she said, reaching up to swipe at her eye with the back of her wrist. Spock looked up at her and stiffened.

"Are you in emotional distress?" he asked, anxiety seeping through her though his tone betrayed nothing.

Nyota giggled, shaking her head as she wiped away another tear. "No, it's the onions!" She stepped back from the counter, squeezing her eyes shut but smiling. "Didn't your mother ever cook with onions?"

Spock observed her curiously. "She often bemoaned the lack of onions on Vulcan. She informed me on numerous occasions that what has been called the Vulcan onion is nothing like its Terran counterpart." He tilted his head as he resumed his chopping. "Though I am sure they must share some characteristics if they have been deemed so comparable."

Nyota just laughed again, and though Spock couldn't say why she was laughing, it gratified him. She too resumed her chopping, letting the tears slide down her cheeks. Impulsively, Spock reached out to wipe one away from her skin and placed his thumb in his mouth, the saltiness covering his tongue. Nyota looked surprised but not upset as she watched his finger.

"I have heard they are saline," he said quietly, and his voice thrummed through her as she watched him taste her tears. She turned away without comment to prevent herself from taking his face in her hands and tasting the salt on his lips…

Instead, she asked him if he could get out a wok or a pot and start cooking the onions. He pulled out a respectable traditional wok and cooking oil and did as she asked.

When the vegetables had been stir fried with some sauce with Vulcan labeling, they brought their meal to Spock's small kitchen table and ate while the lute music lilted in the background. She was surprised by how…simple, and normal, and maybe a little romantic it all seemed.

When she finished, she stood and offered her hands out to him. "Come sit?" she asked, with something in her tone Spock couldn't identify. He let her small, dark hands capture his and lead him to the sofa.

She turned herself towards him, as they'd sat the night before; Spock felt his heart rate increase, and let it. "Could we try something?" she asked quietly. Taking his face in her hands as she had before, she leaned toward him and he felt his hands seek her waist to hold her. She watched him carefully, as though seeking his permission.

"It is quite likely anything you wish to do, I will permit," he said, his voice low. She closed her eyes at his words, and he wondered what she was thinking. But he restrained his hands from seeking her temples, waiting, as he said he would, for her to lead.

She leaned closer, and let their foreheads touch briefly; but then she pressed her lips against his, tentative and questioning. She tasted like salty sauce, but also _her._ Not sure what she wanted, he responded gently; at her tighter grip, he slid his tongue against her lips, wondering if she would let him in…

At her gasp, he pulled back, but she held him firmly close. "You've done that before," she said with unfathomable tone.

He blinked. He had never considered it before, but perhaps with so many partners, some humans discussed experience before beginning? The Terrans he had been with previously had not asked.

"Indeed," he said, unsure what she wanted. "Does that upset you?" he asked, noting the slight crease between her eyes.

"No—I mean, I don't really want to think about it—I just thought…" Nyota seemed unable to focus her thoughts, and Spock resolutely kept himself from feeling her thoughts instead. "I mean, you didn't, last night, so I figured you just didn't really kiss," she finished with a shrug.

"Vulcans do not, generally, engage in oral stimulation to the best of my knowledge," he said, watching her swallow and blink at him. Was he making her uncomfortable? "However, I seem to have inherited some inherent desire for such oral stimulation—" He was cut off by her lips capturing his again, this time more insistently.

She murmured against his mouth, apparently unwilling to pull back far enough to speak properly. "Will you please stop saying 'oral stimulation'?" she said before kissing him again.

He was prevented from asking her why by her leg swinging over his lap so she was settled straddled over him. He caught her hips and repeated the motion with his tongue; this time she parted her lips and allowed him into her mouth. Her hands were kneading his shoulders, and when they slid up his neck and into his hair, he had trouble keeping his mind from sliding over hers; he knew he was too telepathically strong, that his control was too weak…She ran a fingernail down his ear and he pulled away.

"I'm sorry," she murmured, "Do you not like that? It's just that they've always fascinated me…"

"That is not the problem," he assured her. "In fact, I quite enjoyed it."

"Oh?" she said lightly, returning her fingers to the delicate skin. He closed his eyes, but then her ministrations stopped. "Wait, then what's the problem?" Without opening his eyes, he could hear the frown in her voice.

"I will not be able to control—" Again, his words were cut off by her lips.

"I don't want you to," she whispered. And though a tingle went down his spine at her words, he placed his hands on either side of her face to pull her away.

"Please let me finish," he said, withdrawing his hands quickly. It was too much temptation. Obediently, Nyota pressed her lips together. "I wish to link with you," he said, "mentally. But it will be too much for you."

Gently brushing back his bangs, she said, "We can try." His hands continued to smooth up and down her sides as she raised her fingers to his temples. Closing his eyes, he felt her feather-light touches and let his shields back down.

And she was there. He could tell she felt his joy at having her in his mind as well as on his lap. He could sense strong sexual arousal from her, and fantasies danced behind her thoughts, sending a warmth through his body. But as she leaned in to kiss him again, he stopped her. 'I believe I can only handle one or the other, Nyota,' he thought. Mingled displeasure flowed between them. 'What will happen?' she asked. Thoughts flashed through him of losing control, of holding her too tightly or pushing her mind too firmly. And though she felt his shame at having to consider such things, she pressed herself more firmly against him on the couch.

"_I trust you_," she whispered aloud, though he saw in her an acceptance that they would take things slowly. To his disappointment, she removed her fingers from his temples so she could kiss him again.

When she pulled back, he asked quietly, "Are you returning to your dorm?"

She couldn't stop herself from frowning; she tried to tell herself he was just being practical Spock…but did he have to sound so hopeful? "I will if you want me to," she said. As she kicked herself for putting such coldness in her tone, he ran a hand over her hair and surprised her.

"You feel upset; did you take that as a dismissal?"

She smiled with relief, the more sensible part of her mind niggling an _I told you so_ at her. "Sorry. Maybe a little. But I suppose I should get back before ten…" She smoothed a finger down his ear again. "Tomorrow is New Year's…Can I see you?"

"There is a faculty meeting I believe I must attend," he said, "but I should be able to extricate myself before midnight."

"Do you mean a party?" she giggled.

"That may have been the term used."

"Could I come over again? For midnight?" she asked shyly, moving her fingers to the top edging on his shirt.

He pulled her in for another kiss and whispered, "_Please_. _At eleven_."

"Okay," she whispered. "Even though I'll have to sneak out."

Neither of them moved for a moment, but then she planted a kiss on his forehead and started to stand. He arrested her with an insistent hand on her arm, and raised his fingers. It took her a moment, but she realized he wanted her to raise her own; when they touched, he ghosted a feeling over her that he apparently could not voice aloud.

She smiled and kissed him once more. "I don't want to go either," she whispered.

XXXXX

**A/N **I sort of love this chapter…tell me whether you did or didn't!


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer** Not mine

**Chapter Three**

Gaila's unconvincingly stern face greeted Nyota when she got back to the dorm. "Young lady," her roommate said, "why are you home?"

Nyota laughed. "Isn't that the opposite of what you should be saying?"

"You should still be out. The night is young."

"I'll have you know I'm still exhausted from my flight yesterday," Nyota said as she pulled off her sweater and bra to trade them for an old t-shirt. She slipped off her jeans and hopped into bed.

"So oh-for-two nights, huh?"Gaila said.

Nyota wrinkled her nose. "What are you doing in anyways?"

"I thought you might come back," she said lightly. "Waited up for you."

"We can go out tomorrow," Nyota promised. Gaila grinned.

"You gonna see him again?"

"I can't say," Nyota said evasively, but with a small smile.

"I think I'm gonna like this," Gaila responded.

XXX

The next day, Nyota uncharacteristically moped about all day, waiting for the evening. She vid chatted with Sarah about nothing in particular, as she'd decided to keep her new status to as few people as possible; it was bad enough that Gaila already knew. She and the Orion watched a movie, and Nyota even let her roommate start getting her ready extra early to have time to do her hair. Nyota sat back as Gaila plaited the long locks and swept them up only because she couldn't concentrate on anything. After eating at the dining hall, as they walked over to the biggest dorm New Year's party, Nyota said, "It's probably best this happened now…because I wouldn't be able to concentrate on school work."

"You'll be able to," Gaila shrugged, her shimmery short dress sliding another inch off her shoulders. "It wasn't a problem sophomore year."

"But I didn't have as much work. And it wasn't like this," Nyota replied, lowering her voice.

But they walked into the music, and the conversation was lost among the crowd. Despite what had seemed like a quiet campus, most off worlders didn't leave even for the holidays, which meant Starfleet couldn't close dorms. As such, everyone who came back early, most of the off worlders, and those who stayed for extra academic opportunities all crammed into one dorm common room for the New Year's party.

Nyota floated about, noticing Gaila had attached herself even earlier than usual to some guy. She wondered for a moment if she was just lonely, and that's why she hooked up so often…but then she stopped herself. She couldn't apply human psychology to the girl; she was Orion. That usually explained most of it.

Her heart wasn't in her dancing, and she watched part of the celebrations on the broadcast on the opposite wall. Mostly she waited for it to be almost eleven.

XXX

"Where is Professor Cormier?" Spock asked Dr. Ferrous as he lowered himself onto a chair next to the man. The alcoholic drink in his hand was nearly full; he held the prop disinterestedly.

"Went home for the holidays. I didn't tell you?"

Spock shook his head and Ferrous continued speaking. "I was going to go home to my parents' house…but then they decided to take a trip to Africa. Who goes to N'Djamena for Christmas?"

As Spock suspected this was a rhetorical question, he did not answer, and Dr. Ferrous did not continue. Spock watched the crowd of teachers in the local bar thinking about a mathematical article he'd read in the afternoon; knowing he was to see Nyota had settled his mind enough that he could read. Though he didn't notice, his companion too was lost in thought.

They spent an uncharacteristically quiet evening together with the absence of Prof Cormier between them. And at precisely 10:52, he stood, told a surprised Ferrous he preferred to be home before eleven, and left the establishment without having touched his beer.

When he stepped inside the apartment building, he was caught off guard by the scene before him; waiting before the elevator stood Nyota, chatting with a woman who lived on his floor. He recalled her name was Christine Moreland, though he'd only met her once. She'd come to his door when he first moved in to greet him. She was only, in his estimation, three to four years older than him, and on reflection, her interaction may have been flirtatious, though he could not be sure. Her attentions had decreased since the initial interaction, but they passed occasionally in the hallway. Now the petite brunette was speaking with Nyota, who stood approximately ten centimeters taller.

"I'm a friend of Commander Spock's," Nyota told the woman. Though Spock could hear no uneasiness in her tone, he wondered if Christine could.

"I didn't know he was a Commander!" Christine exclaimed. "He only told me he teaches at the military college."

"Right," was Nyota's only reply, but even Spock could hear the tightness in her words. The elevator doors opened and Spock allowed the women to enter without revealing himself.

XXX

Nyota heard the doors hiss closed behind them and wondered what she had gotten herself into. She only willed the woman, apparently Spock's neighbor, not to ask how she knew the Vulcan…

"So how do you know Spock?"

Valiantly resisting the urge to grimace, Nyota made sure her casual smile was in place. She would have to get used to lying like this, wouldn't she? "We only met recently, but he helps me with my Vulcan. _Do you speak at all?_"

The woman laughed and shook her head. "I have no idea what you just said! I've only just got a grip on English, so I probably shouldn't attempt anything new!"

Quickly, Nyota searched for a question to ask that would move attention away from her, but wasn't anything she didn't want to answer about herself. "Did you grow up in the States, then?" she settled for.

The woman nodded and smiled. "San Francisco born and bred! I can't imagine leaving here, really…"

Nyota idly chatted with her while gratefully watching the elevator numbers tick past. At least he didn't live too many floors up. Mercifully, the door whooshed back open and both women stepped through.

"This is me," the woman motioned. "Happy New Year! And tell Mr. Spock I say hello."

"Thank you," Nyota smiled, "and you too." With a sigh of relief, she watched the woman walk into her apartment.

No response came from her chime at Spock's door, but before she could try again, he stepped from the elevator and walked towards her with his hands behind his back. She smiled softly, but he didn't respond as he unlocked his door and let her enter before him.

Still, he didn't speak as they removed their shoes and the lights blinked on automatically at their entrance. He requested a temperature increase of his heating system, then finally turned to her.

"What did you tell Ms. Moreland?" he asked.

Without reaching out to touch his skin, Nyota tried to evaluate the question. It didn't sound like an accusation, but then, it didn't sound like anything at all. Deciding to give him the benefit of the doubt, she replied, "I told her you help with my Vulcan. It wasn't completely a lie."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "How Vulcan of you," he commented. She grinned, and stepped closer.

"Will you please stop shielding yourself from me? How often do I have to ask you to just let me feel everything?"

Spock acquiesced, letting her wrap her arms back around him, and letting his mental shields down. "I will have to break the habit," he said, one eyebrow raised.

Nyota smiled. "Idiom," she teased quietly before sliding her hands up to his neck to pull him into a kiss.

Before he could deepen it, she tugged him over to the couch and started looking for something. "_Video," _Spock said simply, and the screen across from the couch flipped on. "_What do you wish to watch?" _he asked, curious.

Plopping down on the cushion and dragging Spock with her, she folded her legs under her and said, "It's all on voice command and in Vulcan…"

"_It was a simple configuration switch upon installation," _Spock told her, and waited for her to answer his question.

After a moment, she conceded, "The New Year's broadcast, please." The screen showed several boxes with different shows running. "The LA one," Nyota smiled, and the screen smoothly zoomed into a scene with a band playing a pop song. As she snuggled against Spock, who still sat rigidly beside her, she asked, "You don't mind, do you?"

"I do not," Spock replied, his arm snaking around her waist to rest at her hip. He felt gratified by her sigh, which he assumed was one of contentment.

Apparently not actually focusing on the broadcast, Nyota asked, "So how was the faculty party?"

"As expected, it was a frivolous event which I had no desire to attend."

"They do have purpose," Nyota frowned.

"Please explain," Spock said, and Nyota could almost hear his skepticism. She twisted so she could look at him.

"Parties serve a social function to bring greater camaraderie to the group," she said sensibly.

"I do not understand why this is necessary. I rarely have to work directly with my colleagues while teaching."

"But there's a feeling in the school, when everyone gets along and knows each other," Nyota pressed.

Spock replied, "I believe there are some Terran customs I will never truly understand."

"Not if you don't try," Nyota mumbled, turning back to the screen. Spock wondered if he had angered her, and allowed the silence that followed.

After a few moments, Nyota spoke again. "Does Vulcan celebrate the new year, Spock?" she asked.

"Yes," he said. "Despite pressures from the High Council stating that the celebrations are illogical, most households continue to hold festivities."

Though she tried to imagine celebratory Vulcans, she could not. "Is it like here, where we mostly get together with our families and eat?"

"Many Vulcans gather with extended families," Spock conceded, "and at such large gatherings, food is generally served."

"But what does your family do?"

Spock's eyes finally abandoned the screen to meet Nyota's. "When I lived at home, we visited my paternal grandparents' home, where we cooked for everyone." Nyota was apparently satisfied with this response, because she turned back to the banal commentary on the television.

"It's funny, how traditions developed so similarly lightyears apart."

XXX

At midnight Nyota counted down with the broadcast and then turned to Spock expectantly. Quietly, he said, "Happy New Year, Nyota."

She pulled him into a kiss, which turned into a deeper kiss. When she was at the point of climbing onto his lap again, she stopped herself. Experimentally, she rested her forehead against his to communicate instead of talking.

He welcomed her in warmly and she felt his fingers travel up to her temples. _I suppose I should go?_ she asked.

He let her know she was welcome to stay on his account; she wasn't quite sure how he managed this without words, but he did.

_Will I be able to do that?_

He responded, _Yes, my Nyota. I knew what you were referring to, did I not?_ She shivered at his possessive and pressed herself closer. They just sat together, enjoying the silence for a while, but eventually Nyota sat back.

"I think the gates are locking at 12:30. I should go back with the partying crowd," she said.

Spock's only reply was, "Very well."

"Will I see you again?" Something about it all seemed tenuous, and in the dark of his apartment, Nyota tensed before his answer came.

"I am leaving for ten days tomorrow."

"What?" Nyota straightened, surprised that he was going and surprised she didn't know. "Where? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I am telling you now," Spock said in an almost human way. "I must go to the Enterprise with Captain Pike to check on its readiness."

"It's in orbit, right? Why do you have to go?"

Spock studied her for a moment in his guileless way, then answered, "Captain Pike plans to promote me to First Officer, though I must first become a full Commander."

"Oh," Nyota said, eyebrows raised. "So you're going to be on the Enterprise this spring. As First Officer?"

"That is the plan." Why had he never mentioned this? He knew she was trying to get on the Enterprise. That's why she was working so hard to get her thesis done early, and had an overloaded schedule second semester. What if she didn't get on the Enterprise and he left without her? What if she _did_ make the Enterprise and they worked together? Shaking her head minutely, Nyota decided not to think about it. Too complicated, with too many variables.

"That's a long time," she said instead, reaching up to smooth back his bangs. "I'll miss you."

Instead of speaking, Spock raised his fingers to her temple again. _And I you_, he said without words. He'd taken the connection away before Nyota could wonder why he couldn't say it aloud.

XXXXX

**A/N** Sorry for the delay—I've got a really busy life right now! Thanks for the patience, y'all; hope this made up for the wait.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer **None of this is mine. A thanks for Gene, JJ, and Paramount

**Chapter Four**

Spock offered to walk her back to campus, but Nyota didn't think it was a good idea, and declined. She wondered, as she walked the still-loud streets, whether he had thought it was a bad idea, but offered anyway. Partly it seemed out of character, for him to offer what he thought inadvisable; but then, he'd started a relationship with her, hadn't he? He'd told her, pretty clearly, that he thought it was inadvisable. Unreasonable, he'd called it. Yet here she was, meandering back to campus from his apartment, wishing she could have stayed next to him longer, all night…Wishing he could walk her through the streets of revelers. As she sidestepped a drunken classmate stumbling towards campus, she wondered if Spock really had wanted to bring her home to keep her safe.

Halfway back to Starfleet, Nyota joined a group of girls she knew from some of her practical courses and returned to a thankfully empty dorm room anonymously.

XXX

After four hours of sleep and his morning meditation, Spock sent a short message to Nyota to let her know he was leaving. Pike had requested a meeting planetside before their departure, and he did not wish to be late.

Spock re-entered his bedroom with a softly spoken, "_Light." _He paused for a moment inside the doorway when an image of Nyota sitting on his bed assaulted his mind. Shoving it away, he focused on the duffel packed and waiting on the floor by his dresser, and walked over to his closet. Inside hung his black trousers and undershirt and science-blue uniform. He changed efficiently, noting the snug fit of his shirt and calculating that he would have to increase his time in the gym by 5% this semester to return to service-level fitness. He would, of course, receive a new shirt when he was promoted to Commander.

When he'd zipped up his boots, Spock shouldered his bag and left the apartment, locking it without a backward glance.

XXX

_Cadet Uhura,_

_I will be transporting at approximately 0800. If you wish to contact me, my comm will be within range. Endeavor to have a productive break._

_Lt. Commander Spock_

Nyota stared at the message on her personal PADD. She'd been awoken by its chiming; the sun seemed to be only just rising, if she was any judge of the light fighting its way in around the blinds. Gaila hadn't returned, and she still felt exhausted, as she hung off the side of her bed, but she retained the PADD in her hands, frowning.

Spock was going to take some getting used to. She was trying very hard not to be angry with him for the curt note. She wasn't actually angry, was she? Shaking her head, she told herself she was being ridiculous. Instead, she imagined him whispering the message into her mind and convinced herself there would be warmth beneath the thought that they could be in touch, and sincerity about being productive.

Her frown deepened when she realized they probably wouldn't actually be in touch very much. Why did he have to have this assignment just as they were getting used to each other? She couldn't send or say anything compromising over comm, and his words weren't the same as his feelings. Tossing the PADD away disappointedly, Nyota burrowed back under her covers and tried to stop her brain from thinking so she could go back to sleep.

It didn't work well.

When she woke up in earnest, groggy because of the interruption, Nyota lounged about for only forty five minutes before tackling one of her new references for her thesis. Gaila walked in around noontime in the same shimmery dress, her hair somehow perfectly smoothed into soft waves, to find Nyota curled on her bed staring at the PADD before her.

"Nyota, that's disgusting," Gaila said as she stripped off her dress and began to rummage for a new bra and panties. "Homework at noon on January first?"

Feeling antagonistic, Nyota asked, "Nice walk of shame, Gaila?" When her roommate didn't laugh her off as she'd expected, Nyota looked up, worried she'd upset her. Gaila stood scowling at her with a matching set of underwear dangling from her fingers.

"Because you didn't take one home from a _professor's_ apartment last night?" she said.

Nyota raised her eyebrows. "You know very well we did not. I'm going to the library," she announced when Gaila turned around with an obnoxiously superior expression. The Orion didn't say anything as Nyota gathered her things and moved to leave the room.

That wasn't like them, Nyota ruminated as she walked across campus. They hadn't fought since sophomore year, even with the times Gaila hogged the room. Maybe she took her anger out on Gaila too much because she knew the lighthearted girl would just laugh it off. She'd try to be nicer…

Nyota actually paused in her steps when she realized where she was headed. The library…where Marcus worked. Her ex. She started walking again, hoping fervently that he wasn't on shift, or that he'd gone home for the holidays…

She needn't have worried, because the library ended up being closed. The great stone building that few people used stood dark and silent and locked, so Nyota found herself wishing she could go back to Spock's office or, even better, his apartment, to work, but turning her steps back to the dorm instead.

XXX

Pike stood at the head of the room with his customary meeting expression in place; based on the silence around him, Spock wondered if his companions perceived it as intimidating. Generally pre-meeting waits were drowned in idle, useless chatter, but the conference room tucked away into the Administrative Building was silent but for the rustle of clothes and papers. Spock stayed still, watching Pike and waiting for him to speak.

When the door clicked shut behind the last officer, Pike placed his hands on the table and leaned forward. Any sounds that had remained ceased.

"Alright, everyone, we know why we're here. The Enterprise is scheduled for launch late this summer, and all of you are going to be on it. I hope you're ready for the honor," he said, eyes sweeping the room smoothly. "The NCC-1701 is a damn nice ship, and I want her crew to get along." The captain sat down. "It's time for introductions."

Spock found the succeeding thirty four minutes exceedingly dull. While cataloguing the incoming information by habit, he began running through the transporting and loading configuration data he'd committed to memory when Pike sent it to him. He kept his own introduction succinct.

"I am Lieutenant Commander Spock, to be Commander within 2.5 months. I will be First Officer and Science Officer."

After a short pause, Pike added, unnecessarily, "Spock is Vulcan, but he studied at Starfleet and is one of the Academy's most distinguished alumnae. He served under me on the Farragut for two years, and earned his promotion over several missions, including the Delta Nebula Five Expedition I'm sure most of you heard about." Spock kept his steady gaze on his captain despite the sideways glances he saw and the murmuring that began. Pike gave the room a stern sort of glare which Spock could not interpret before the man seated next to him began speaking.

When they'd finished, and Pike had given a short speech about himself and the Enterprise, they all rose to go to the back of the hangar decks, where they could transport up to the awaiting NCC-1701.

XXX

Nyota returned to the dorm shame-faced, but Gaila had disappeared. The silence of the room distracted her from her work, and when the door hissed open not long after, her eyes snapped up from where they were stuck at one spot on the page.

Gaila paused in the doorway; she clearly hadn't expected Nyota to be back.

"The library was closed," Nyota said by way of explanation. Gaila just entered the room and stood before her for a moment. Her shoulders slumped.

"I can't stay mad at you. You look so pitiful."

"I'm not pitiful!" Nyota insisted, but instead of feeling angry, she was just relieved her roommate had apparently forgiven her. The place was dull with no one to talk to.

"I can't let you do work right now. It's just not okay." She grasped Nyota by the arm and started to hoist her up. "A bunch of us are starting a _Colony Seven _marathon, and you're going to come watch. I only came back to grab a pillow."

"I was going to work on…" Nyota started half heartedly, but when Gaila gave her a stern look, she capitulated with a good natured sigh. "Oh, alright. I've only seen the first season—"

"Then here," Gaila grinned as she shoved Nyota's pillow at her. "You'll love it."

The two girls carried their pillows upstairs to the common area, their small spat forgotten. The marathon almost took Nyota's mind off of Spock's absence. Almost; she couldn't stop herself from wishing she was curled up against his side on the couch, or from giggling to herself every time she knew a scene would affront him. And every time a starship came to visit Colony Seven, she thought of Spock and whether he was up in orbit yet.

XXX

Up in orbit, Spock stood guard as package after package transported up. He ran figures in his head as he checked each box and cross referenced the list in his hand. He found it illogical that he was in charge of a simple task when he could begin his more complex duties as Science Officer. However, Pike had assigned him check-in duty, and he would perform it thoroughly.

Two hours later, when he was told to take a lunch break, Spock checked his PADD for a response from Nyota. She had not sent one.

She hadn't even sent one by the time he was directed to his quarters in the evening.

His PADD was still in his hands as he entered the bare room. He would code the door to his voice after meditating, he decided; though many men had to take temporary lodgings, Captain Pike had assured him this would be the cabin Spock would inhabit during his post on the Enterprise. As First Officer, he was assigned a relatively roomy space: in front, there was room to work, or entertain, at a desk awaiting its computer, while the bed and wardrobe were concealed behind a half-wall. He even had shelving, though he did not anticipate needing much in this room; his cabin on the Farragut had seen him only during his necessary sleep and meditation time.

He sat on the unmade bed still considering the PADD in his hands, dimly aware of the new-furnishings smell. An unanticipated feeling invaded him, akin to what he felt when he had first left Vulcan. His mother had called it homesickness. Though he did not think of Starfleet as his home, he was, apparently, missing it. Spock tilted his head to one side slightly.

Chances were low that Nyota had not received his message, as she checked her PADD approximately six times a day, if his extrapolation was correct. More likely she had received his message and decided not to reply; her motivation not to do so was the true conundrum. Setting the PADD aside, Spock wondered if more time spent in company with her thoughts would assist him in anticipating her motivations. This one he could not puzzle out.

So instead, he sat in lotus pose on the bare bed, cataloguing the changes he would have to make to the computer, so it would recognize Vulcan commands, to the door so it would recognize him, to the science station bridge controls to make them more efficient…

Yet all the while, an echo of Nyota's warmth occupied the space next to him in his mind.

XXXXX

**A/N** First of all, thank you so much to those who left such thoughtful comments last chapter. You are what keeps me writing even though it's hard to fit in.

On that topic: this is getting ridiculous. I hate (not) updating like this. I just really can't fit in writing as regularly this year, and I don't feel it's as fair to any of us, story included. I completely intend to finish it, but I can continue at a snail's pace like this…or I can hold off until I have more time to write, probably in a few months. Comments? I'd really like to know what you all think!


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